Ayah once yelled at our Indonesian helper for ‘spoiling’ his fresh-from-market lamb chops. He told her earlier that he was going to prepare the lamb chop – but by the time he went to the kitchen the girl had already cut the lamb chop into small pieces, which made him really upset. The poor girl thought that she was making things easier for my father by cutting the meat beforehand, innocently oblivious to the fact that lamb chops are supposed to be as they were.
Mak quickly consoled Ayah, “Well, she’d already cut it, you can’t do much about it now. But I’m sure she’s learned her lesson, dear. After all, she thought she was just being helpful. She did not even know she was doing something wrong because she was totally ignorant about lamb chops and what they are supposed to look like”
It’s true isn’t it – sometimes we did something wrong and did not even realised it due to our ignorance?
For example, yesterday I unintentionally caused a friend some distress over an e-mail sent to higher-level officers. Apparently, there was some flare-up at her office involving e-mail sent to a higher-level officer which have caused her colleague some trouble. Working in another office, I had no idea of what was happening at her workplace, so when I forwarded her e-mail to a higher level officer, it was done in good faith. After all, the officer also knows my friend and so I thought it wasn’t a big deal.
So I was taken aback when I received an e-mail by my friend scolding me rather harshly for what I did, which was also c.c. to a few other mutual friends. I took a deep breath before I replied that e-mail, apologizing and at the same time explaining why I did so.
When she replied, in a softer tone – telling us how disturbed her friend was, and how she cried on my friend’s shoulder due to the mix-up caused by the e-mail sent to the higher-level officer, and all - only then understanding dawned on me…
I did something wrong, for which I am really sorry. But believe me, I did not realised it due to my ignorance of what took place in her office. If I had known, I wouldn’t have done such thing. And dear R, trust me, I've learned my lesson. If it's any consolation, you may take this as a public apology.
2 comments:
hmm...pity you and the maid. A case of good intention turned bad but you did get to explain yourself. Maybe R is just making a big deal of out it for whatever valid reasons R might have....oops somebody's being bias.
Anon: I've gone to see her to apologize in person. R's still hurt & although she was civil, our conversation lacked any real warmth. I've apologised - that's the only thing I can do about it since what's done could not be undone. I just hope she'll forgive me some day. I won't undermine her thoughts and opinions on the incident - after all, different things affect different people differently...
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